BIG BREW 2014 MINUTES!!!

There were no gang smackdowns or slashing switchblades at Big Brew 2014, just a minor butane explosion and a major party foul. This years’ event was held at B&J’s Pizza on Staples at Timbergate, hosted by the Bearded Brewer, Kyle Hotz. By 10:30 a.m. the B.A.S.H. canopy was erected and the Fuzzy’s breakfast tacos were on order.

Outside, Paul Holder and Aggie Bill Hughen began their demonstration brew of an all-grain American pale ale using Bill’s mobile brewing system. Inside, Kyle tapped the 2014 version of B&J’s Vic’s Poteet Strawberry Ale, along with the Big Shell Amber Ale. Travis Clapp helped Kyle brew a 15-gallon batch of Cubano ale on B&J’s system. Eventually, Chris Edwards and Zach Romo began a demonstration brew of an extract Russian Imperial Stout, using Tom Freund’s propane-fired system. Rookie Chris was to experience a steep learning curve on the joys of open-flame brewing …

NEWSFLASH !!!!!!! John Milan is STILL NOT DEAD !!!!! The Mysterious Medical Miracle (otherwise known as Beef Jerky Man) showed up in the flesh, still fat, sassy and mean as a snake. As high noon approached, Wild Bill Lehfeld was the only B.A.S.H. officer present. By the powers invested in himself by himself, he commanded everyone to raise their glass on high in the global synchronized toast to homebrewing. It occurred one minute late, to allow a late-arriving Rocky Freund to run inside and grab a beer. “Time waits for no man, but it waits for Rocky”! Check out Chris Swanson’s Big Brew 2014 Part I video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBMHvQxKBVM

As the demonstration brews progressed and attracted hordes of curious onlookers, Travis was asked to explain the philosophy behind the naming of B&J’s Man Pigeon Köllsch. Said Travis “Every man is born free … as free as a bird. But what kind of bird are you? If you haven’t achieved your desired station in life you’re just a man pigeon, annoying as hell and pooping everywhere”! Even by Travis standards that’s utter nonsense. The beer, however, is delicious.

Back outside, Chris Swanson was donating empty bottles to Claudio Montiel and Paul Kalaghan and wife “Noreen with a D” were regaling all with tales of owning a homebrew supply shop in the wild and wooly 90’s. Suddenly, the calm was shattered by a loud BOOM. It seems that Chris Edwards had left a butane igniter on top of Tom’s propane burner. During the ensuing chaos, the brew pot made like Old Faithful and erupted into a geyser of Imperial stout. The EPA and TCEQ were notified, the Coast Guard deployed containment booms, drones were launched overhead and the cleanup commenced. A contest then began to name the ill-fated brew. Some suggestions were “The Big Spill”, “Oil Slick Stout” and “La Brea Tar Pits”. It’s documented for all eternity in Chris Swanson’s Big Brew 2014 Part II video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qHGVZCR_CRE

Meanwhile, the usual beer-fuelled quotations spewed forth, such as “The hot tub is broken, we had to let the lobsters go”, “He was a hoss, he was an ox, like myself”, “It’s getting mighty viscous” followed by “That’s what she said”.

By 2:30 p.m. Paul and Aggie Bill were all done. By 3:00, it was time to go home and take a big-@ssed nap before reconvening at The Man Shack for Inventory Reduction. One final detail – taking down the B.A.S.H. canopy. While this structure gamely battled the wind all day, an unfortunate directional shift during disassembly led to a nearly disastrous double back flip. A quick reacting crew saved the day. We survived another Big Brew !

Upcoming B.A.S.H. events:

• 18-May-14: B.A.S.H. meeting (3rd Sunday, John Daniels) 
• 8-June-14: B.A.S.H. meeting (Danna Sharpe, German wheat/rye beer competition, BJCP 15A-D) 
• 13-July-14: B.A.S.H. meeting (B&Js Pizza on Staples at Timbergate, brewing demonstration) 
• 2-Aug-14: Mead Day (need host, multiple brewing demonstrations) 
• 10-Aug-14: B.A.S.H. meeting (need host, Saison competition, BJCP 16C) 
• 14-Sep-14: B.A.S.H. meeting (need host, brewing demonstration) 
• 12-Oct-14: B.A.S.H. meeting (Claudio Montiel, bock competition, BJCP 5A-D) 
• 1-Nov-14: Iron Mash XI (B&Js Pizza on Staples at Timbergate, multiple brewing demonstrations) 
• 9-Nov-14: B.A.S.H. meeting (Andrew Herzig/Sabrina Krueger, barleywine competition, BJCP 19B/19C) 
• 14-Dec-14: B.A.S.H. meeting (Carroll Pate, brewing demonstration) 

See you at The Daniels’!